I find this topic to be especially pertinent as the world reads the report of a large denomination’s failure in living out the true Gospel. I believe one of the big issues in Christianity is There is such a heavy focus on the right now. How do we impact today? What ministry do we need now that’ll grow our church? The focus of our world is quick fixes and more and more micromanaging of our time and resources and head space.
Things simply are not built to last anymore. I’ve been thinking about the concept of leaving a legacy a lot lately. I’ve been thinking of it specifically in the church. Whenever scandal hits the church I am reminded that what I do with my life matters. Whether I want it or not, I will be remembered. What we do with that dash in between our north year and our death year is important.
Your kids need church. We’ve already established that they need the Gospel daily. They need to hear and see the Gospel at work in your life and church is there in a way to help reinforce what you have been teaching and demonstrating to them. So here’s a non-exhaustive list of what your kids need from your church.
1. They need a place that preaches the Gospel
There are a lot of churches out there and not all preach the Gospel. This should be a priority when examining your current church or finding a new church. You want a place where your kids are constantly hearing about how Jesus came to die for our sins on a cross and how he rose from the grave so we can live forever with him as our Lord and Savior. It should be like breathing.
2. They need a place where other adults practice what mom and dad preach
You’ve set out to do the hard work of being a godly parent. Next step you need is other adults around your kids that see that what mom and dad are saying is true. This means that you need to be a part of a church where other adults are seeking to live out the Gospel in their daily lives.
3. They need a place where it’s okay to be a kid
My kids have good days and bad days. They climb on chairs sometimes and don’t know how to sit quietly. This needs to be okay. Obviously, we must not let our kids run wild, but our churches need to be places where our boys and girls shouldn’t fear being in trouble because they are having a bad day and are struggling to obey or work through emotions.
4. They need a place where they are engaged in conversation
Oftentimes, kids in churches are relegated to a basement, a separate wing, or just let to run rampant all over the place. Your kids want to be conversed with. This also means as parents we need to be teaching our kids how to have a conversation with someone. They need a place where people look them in the eye and ask them how they are doing or what they did in the last week and then they have the ability to ask those questions in return.
5. They need a place that handles problems in a godly way
Your kids will see sin at church. They should. They should also see sin be handled in a proper and timely manner. Pastors should seek to preach confessionally on a more regular basis. Children should see conviction of sin in congregation members. They should see mom and dad seeking restoration in areas they fall in as well. The Church isn’t the place for Christians to put a brave face on and act like all is well in their world. We can agree, that isn’t healthy.
6. They need good friendships
The Church should be a place where lasting friendships are forged. As parents, this means we must be engaging with those around us. We must befriend other people. We must have people over for dinner and fellowship with our fellow man so our kids can see godly friendship portrayed for them. Our kids need to see other kids that they can hang out with, laugh with, have fun with, and get to know.
7. They need a level of discipleship
There is a certain level where discipleship needs ti happen in your kid’s life at church. Whether in a Sunday school setting, children’s church, or small group, your kid needs people that will pour into them, ask them good questions, and help them grow in their walk with Christ. Your kids will not remember all the lessons they are taught in church, but what they will remember is the man or woman that taught it to them and how they influenced them.
8. They need to be welcomed to the family when they profess Christ
This is a huge one. When our kids profess Christ, it should be celebrated. When a sinner comes to God, we get excited. We should be in churches that do the same with our kids. Sadly, this is a topic that has been pushed to the side, or worse, it’s a topic where leaders will on purpose or inadvertently cast doubt on a child’s profession. Find a place where kids are coming to Christ. Find a place where kids are coming to Christ and the church is celebrating that.
9. They need a place where they can serve
Church is not a place where we come to just sit and glean and then move on with our day. We are called to serve both the church and the community around us and finding a church that puts an emphasis on ways that your kids can serve God is important. There are age-appropriate ways our kids can serve in church. We should encourage this and we should gladly serve alongside of them for the glory of God.
10. They need a place where they can be challenged
The Christian walk is hard. Your kids need a place where God’s Word is taught to its fullest. They need to hear that sin is wrong and we should seek to live a life that is worthy of the Gospel. Far too often in our churches, we go shallow with teaching, both in kid’s church and big church. Carefully examine your place of worship and see if you are being challenged in your walk with God there. Your kids need this and you need this as well.
11. They need a place that prioritizes God’s Word
I like children’s church. I’d also put an asterisk next to it and say that I love Children’s church when it is doing the good and hard work of teaching God’s Word fervently to each and every child that walks in our doors. There should be a culture at our churches where God’s Word is taught. The Bible is what we need to hear.
12. They need a place where they can mess up
Childhood is the training grounds of life and being a part of a local assembly where your kids can sin and see proper restoration take place is imperative. We have plenty of callous adults who grew up in churches and left because of hypocrisy and because they weren’t accepted and because they were sinners. The church is the place where it should be okay to fall because there our believers all around them that are able to help them get back up.
13. They need a place where they see mom and dad worship
Your kids need to see that church is important to you, that you enjoy being there, and that the worship of God is why you are there. Your kids need to see you shaking hands with friends and conversing. Your kids need to hear you sing out loud. Your kids need to see you engaged to the preaching of God’s Word. Your kids need you to stay after church a little bit so that you can fellowship with your brothers and sisters in Christ.
14. They need a place where they see people of all ages fellowshipping
Everyone at your church or in your circle of people at your church should not look like you. I’m in my 30s and I have kids, so I’m naturally going to be around lots of other people in there 30s and have kids, but my kids should see me with the elderly in the church laughing and enjoying friendship. My kids should see me interacting with the college students and singles in the church. My kids should see me talking with other kids and teens in church. Christianity is multi-generational and we should be in places that encourage that type of fellowship.
15. They need a place that teaches doctrine
Funny stories are cool. Puppet shows work kind of. Popular praise songs are nice. My kids and your kids need a place where they are taught doctrine. They need to see from a congregational standpoint that memorizing Scripture is a great thing. They need to hear theology. They need to hear words that they may not understand so that they can be taught. Our churches are far too easy sometimes and our kids deserve more. Our kids deserve to be taught well. They need that strings foundation so that they can go on and continue growing when they are older.
Comments